people, relationships, existence, & love | #12-20 of 33 things I learned in 2021 (pt. 2)

Part 1 focused on inner emotions and dealing with tough times.

Part 2 focuses on relationships with people and oneself, existence, and love.

12. Fully accept people with their flaws. The most fragrant roses have thorns that can hurt sometimes. No one is perfect and everyone has their low moments sometimes. Give yourself and others the space and acceptance needed to bloom, instead of wishing for things to change overnight. If you can’t accept someone’s thorns and find them too hurtful for yourself, create some boundaries and distance to preserve your sanity. But don’t expect the thorns to just go away. You must accept their reality.

13. Self-acceptance is liberating. It is something that needs practice but can have a very positive impact in many areas of your life. Sometimes practicing self-acceptance looks like not deleting or editing any of your old work because it looks “cringy”, but accepting that as a part of your journey. Sometimes it looks like not deleting your pictures because you don’t think you look good enough. So what if you think you don’t look okay? Deleting the picture won’t change how you look. Just accept it. The more you accept yourself, the less time you spend on these trivial things in life.

14. The weeds of ego should be trimmed regularly. No matter how many times people may tell you they think you’re humble, it’s important that you trust your inner feeling when it comes to things like this. What goes on inside of us cannot always be sensed by others. If you feel that your pride might be getting to your head, it’s a good idea to not let your guard down with ego. It shouldn’t be forgotten that ego can be very destructive.

15. True friendships are wonderful. Romantic relationships are celebrated so much in the media. Tons of songs and movies are made for them. But in tough times, it’s a wonderful friendship that breaks your fall and makes life beautiful and brighter. Having a friend by your side can make existence so much easier to deal with. So I don’t know why more isn’t said about friendships like this that are pure gold. A rare unicorn in the wild.

16. Love gives meaning to existence. The genuine love you feel in your heart for someone, that makes you want to fight on their behalf, protect them, and wish the absolute best for them, is what makes life worth living. Suddenly the case of finding meaning in this life doesn’t feel so cold and impersonal anymore. There’s isn’t always much logic to love. It can’t be forced but only felt. Love is the sweetness and warmth that make the bitter aspects of existence palatable.

17. Respect and common courtesy are different things. One is earned, and one is given regardless. Everyone does not necessarily deserve to be given more than common courtesy. If someone does something disrespectful or demands respect from you that you don’t have in your heart for them, you can treat them well while maintaining a distance. Things like respect and trust must be earned.

18. Everyone thinks and feels differently. At least to a degree. It’s important to not project your own thoughts and feelings onto them and think on their behalf so much. If people do something you wouldn’t do, you could come to terms with that easier by understanding they operate differently. Instead of wondering about it, you can directly ask them about it for better clarity.

19. Don’t chase people for love. Or their attention. People who want to be with you, and not lose their connection with you, will also take action to maintain a relationship with you. Yes, even those who are more introverted 🙂 Where your efforts are reciprocated, you won’t feel like pulling teeth just to get some time with them. Cherish those who reciprocate. If you still wish to express your love to those who don’t, remove the expectations from your mind.

20. Believe in yourself. Sometimes it is our perception that others don’t believe in us. Maybe you don’t understand them, they’re just frustrated, or they don’t understand your circumstances. Other times people really don’t believe in you. Belief in oneself should not be dependent on what others think about you. If you’re not going to give up, then hold onto your belief in yourself and build trust and love with yourself too. Then keep going. Develop a friendship with your own self. It can help you stay resilient.

Bonus: People are more important than just work. What are you working for? Will it really make a difference? Is it really so important that you sacrifice your time with your loved ones for it? Would you regret doing so? Once people are gone, or time with them is lost, things can’t return to be the same. You might lose your chance to be with people, or be there for them when you’re needed until it’s too late. Keep things in perspective.


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